life as a {mostly} stay at home mom

When I was pregnant with Mason, teaching full-time and going to graduate school full-time, I would often find myself day dreaming about the future of staying at home all day with our little guy. I couldn't wait to be a new kind of busy--instead of darting from work to school to homework day after day, I was excited to fill my days with diapers, fruit snacks and Sesame Street. I have officially been a stay at home mom (other than my part-time "seasonal" work at the U), for one full school year. I still measure life by school years. I love it. I am so grateful to be with Mason during the day. I know there are many moms (and dads) who wish they could be at home and don't have the opportunity.

Over the last few months as Mason has settled into a regular nap schedule, I have all of the sudden found myself with a little more free time than I have had...ever? It sounds ridiculous, but sometimes I don't know what to do with myself. You can only watch so much Dr. Phil and spend so much time on Pinterest before you start to feel like you are being totally unproductive. {Which I am.} I hate being unproductive. But, the viciousness of the cycle is, when I am not busy I am completely unproductive. It takes me days to put away laundry, there is little to no motivation to cook dinner and doing anything but putting my hair up wet right out of the shower seems like way too much effort. So why is that? I have a list of projects I would like to complete before the new baby comes and a lot of rooms/closets/cabinets that could use some rearranging, but I just can't find the motivation to do anything. (Not to mention that if my child were born today she would be naked and without a bed). Why is it that when you have time to do all of those "extra" things that it is incredibly hard to find the motivation to do it? Am I the only one in that boat?

So here's to finding the balance of being mom and that person who worked her butt off to get a master's degree while pregnant and teaching full-time.

And just because it's adorable, Mason taking Bandith for a "walk" around the living room. This is his new favorite past time that must be repeated at least fifteen times a day. Also, Mason is obsessed with the blow dryer and will hold it up to his head to "dry" his hair. (Which is an anomaly considering the days of my blow dryer use are few and far between...).


Mason: Two months

Mason at two months...
loves activity mat
 intrigued lights 
loves Elephant mobile
loves to look at blinds and windows in bedroom
loves being outside
has decided to like binkies (Avent brand)
swing, finally!
eats 3-5 ounces a feeding
usually (not always) sleeps 9:30 pm-5:15 am
naps in morning
still figuring out afternoon naps
started smiling
makes little cooing sounds
doesn't like neck stretches or tummy time
wears size 1-2 diapers
wears 0-3 month clothes
weighs 12 lb 7.5 ounces- 60th percentile
85th percentile for head and height
loves to be held
had 2 month immunizations-loved the oral one
likes to snuggle in bed
Bandith is getting more used to him-naps with him in his room
tracks people and object with eyes
chews on his arm and hands
holds his head up more
sneezes three times in a row

Looking forward too..
rolling over
napping in afternoon


Mason: One Month

Mason at One Month...

Weighs: about 9 1/2- 10 lbs. (haven't been to the doctor to be weighed for 2 weeks)
becoming very observant
loves looking at window/blinds in bedroom
loves looking at lights
loves to eat!
eats 3-4 ounces each feeding
nick name: "milk monster"
likes to sit with boppy or in car seat
likes to be in moby (infant carrier)
doesn't really like bouncy seat or swing
lovs to be held and snuggled
wakes up 1-2 times a night
eyes are starting to turn brown
wears 0-3 month clothes
lots of hair in back but has rubbed all off top of head
loves music
strong head and neck-can hold up for a few seconds

looking forward to...
becoming more observant
sleeping through night


Mason's Story

39 weeks and 5 days. Don made me take this picture. When your maternity clothes are too small, it is time to stop being photographed. 
 My entire pregnancy I had one goal (well, that's not true, but it was one of the biggest goals): to make it to 38 weeks aka the last day of school. And if I didn't make it to 38 weeks, I wanted the baby to come soon enough so that my class could meet this baby who had been growing basically the entire school year. They sure were troopers to deal with a pregnant teacher the whole year. The last day of school came and went.

It was an emotional, yet exciting day. Last day of teaching. Forever? Who knows. At least for now. I cried in the assembly that they said goodbye to me and three other teachers. But, I also packed my car up with the remains of my classroom as fast as I could after school got out. I was out of the building 20 minutes after school ended. (I had spent the previous weeks packing away and filling our guest bedroom to the brim with teaching stuff). Funny how mixed the emotions were. I had made it. Now the baby could come...like, that night. Turns out our babe had plans of his own.

Two weeks went by...my due date came and went. Two days past my due date came and I sat in my doctor's office where I nearly cried telling my lovely doctor I had had zero contractions. Zero. And I was 40.2 weeks pregnant and HUGE. I had been scheduled to be induced at 41 weeks. It was, at least, an end. I was still hopeful I would start labor naturally so I could proceed forward with my natural birth plan. Yes, it's true. Natural. More on that later. 

The weekend came: 5 days overdue. Zero contractions. Every inch of our house and garage had been cleaned, rearranged and organized. Don and I decided to take advantage of our for sure-even though every weekend for the last 5 weeks we had been saying it could be the last-child-less weekend. We headed to the Farmer's Market downtown. There was of course no parking spot close enough for the pregnant woman to waddle, so off to Red Iguana we went instead. Where we  I ate myself sick. It was lovely. Mmm... 

That night we went to bed around midnight. I got up for my hourly bathroom break and went back to bed when suddenly I felt a huge gush. For the last 9 months I had been wondering if I would know when my water broke. Oh how silly of me, how could you not know?  I woke Don up who started running around like a crazy person repacking my hospital bag that, up until about 3 hours before, had been neatly packed and waiting for 4 weeks. Earlier that day I had decided to unpack my bag-who knows why-with plans to repack the next day. 

The drive to the hospital was very surreal. I was about to give birth. Birth. Oh my. As we arrived at the hospital, we saw 3 other pregnant women waddling into the hospital. Thank you, full moon. By 3:00 am we were all checked in. My water had broken and I was dilated to a 4. I still had had zero contractions. 

At the hospital waiting to be checked in
This is the part of the story where it all starts to get a little blurry. The first anesthesiologist had a difficult time putting my epidural in. He put it in 4 different times. It finally took effect on my right side, but not the left. The shift changed and in came the next anesthesiologist who took the epidural out and tried again 3 times. I have now received 7 epidurals. Fun. This time it finally took effect on both sides. The day went on and I was slowly progressing. 2 pm rolled around-12 hours into labor-and I was only at 5 cm. Around 5 pm I was at 7 or 8 cm when my epidural started to become less effective. I was now feeling everything on my right side. The next anesthesiologist came in re-dosed and then later tried to redo the epidural twice. I had now received 10 epidurals and was sure feeling alot. At 10 pm (20 hours into labor) it was finally time to start pushing. I pushed for 3 hours but now at 23 hours into labor and feeling everything, I was beyond exhausted. Even with all the pushing, Mason had not dropped at all. It was time for a new plan: a c-section. 

I was disappointed that my natural birth plan had taken a complete 180, but I was so ready for our little guy to arrive. They took me into the OR to prep me. About 20 minutes later Don was able to come in. It was so surreal laying on the table with the sheet in front of me. I couldn't believe that after 24 hours of labor in just a few minutes we would be meeting our son. Everything you've heard about c-sections is true, there's alot of pressure that can sometimes almost be painful. Within a few minutes, our sweet little baby was here. The doctor brought him over for a quick glance (way too short) and then took him over to the team of pediatricians that was waiting to check on him. I couldn't believe he was finally here! Don went over with Mason for what seemed like another 24 hours. Finally Don brought Mason over and we just stared at him while they finished sewing everything up. 

Yes I was 1 week later, yes I was in labor for 24 hours and had to have my epidural redone 10 times and yes I would do it all again this minute for our little Mason. 
Mason Matthew Willie
Monday, June 24, 2013
2:31 am
8 lbs. 10 oz. 21 inches
Finally in recovery with our sweet baby boy

First family photo
Don had diaper duty the whole time we were at the hospital because of my c-section. He did an amazing job! 

Finally on Thursday evening we were able to bring our little baby home!


21 weeks

How far along? 21 weeks
Maternity clothes? Still mostly pants, some maternity t-shirts. Maternity leggings are THE BEST invention ever.
Stretch marks? Nope.
Sleep: I am sleeping pretty well. Although, I have had some very strange pregnancy dreams.
Best moment this week: Don felt the baby kick! It has just happened once, but hopefully he'll start feeling alot more movement.
Miss anything? Sleeping on my stomach
Movement: Lots and lots of movement. Usually at school when I am reading with small groups of kids (because I am actually sitting down) and at night.
Food cravings: avocados and anything salty! Mmm...
Anything making you queasy or sick? Luckily not this week. Hopefully we're done with that.
Gender: Boy
Symptoms: Lower back pain (prenatal yoga has been saving me).
Looking forward to: Feeling more movement and decorating the nursery!


17 weeks & a small update

I am not even going to make a new year's resolution to blog more, because as long as we have the full-time work/full-time grad school thing going on at our house, that's just not happening. So, as per tradition, here's the annual update.

We found out that we are expecting our first baby! I took 6 pregnancy tests because I couldn't believe it was real (in a good way). That news of course has been the highlight of the last few months. And other than the usual Thanksgiving/Christmas stuff, we have headed to baby land. We have been busy preparing for baby, even though he has a while until his debut. Winter break is my last real break from school/work until he arrives. So, let the nesting begin!

How far along? 17 weeks
Maternity clothes? Mostly just pants. It makes my stomach hurt to have anything pushing on my stomach. Plus I am large. Not cute-pregnant large, but people judge me because they think I-ate-too- many-holiday-treats large.
Stretch marks? Nope.
Sleep: For a while I was waking up every morning at 4:30 am and could never fall back asleep (in addition to the bathroom trips throughout the night). Luckily that has gone away, and I am sleeping pretty well.
Best moment this week: Starting to buy BOY baby clothes, now that we know what we're having.
Miss anything? Ibuprofen. I have been plagued with almost daily headaches and let's face it, Tylenol is just not good.
Movement: One or two times I have thought I have felt something, but it's hard to say.
Food cravings: water (I have to constantly be drinking--I am so thirsty!) Other than that, not really. The ramen noodle/ white rice phase has gone away (aka plain, bland food).
Anything making you queasy or sick? Not this week. The gagging about every.little.thing has seemed to subside.
Gender: Boy
Symptoms: Headaches and zero energy
Looking forward to: Telling the first graders that the baby is a boy! Before we went on winter break, we made a graph of what they thought the baby was. Nearly  everyone thought a girl--mostly because I have a girl-heavy class and they all voted girl. :)


The Garden

This was the first summer we spent in our house and it was fun to plant a little garden. This is only the second time I have planted anything (seriously), so it was a big learning experience! Somewhere there is a picture of the actual garden, but we all know what those look like. We were able to get enough tomatoes to make/can 25 jars of spaghetti sauce, so I would consider that a success. The biggest thing I learned was NOT to plant 3 zucchini plants. 1 is more than enough. Geez. 

Peach jelly from Brigham City peaches. 

Thanks, Brigham City for the peaches!

The pumpkin we didn't plant...

Bandith has mixed feelings about all of the gardening and canning fun.